Commander's Personal Log - Z'Hai V'Erin D'Snett

Captain's Personal Log (continued) Star Date - 65860.7

...I carried out my orders "to the letter" and apprehended K'run. However, the orders we vague and open to "interpretation" as to her disposition after being taken into custody...

...I met with several individuals concerning the current situation. We have pooled our resources and are carrying out the actions we decided on...

...during our "conversation" the data (including the arrest order) were deleted from the Star Fleet database, my suspicion grows by the moment...

...I have transferred to the Chesapeake, the "cargo" is already at the location, I am returning at best speed to the safe zone...

...dark times are on the horizon, we've all become "shadow warriors"...may the gods of my ancestors watch over us...

-end log-

Captain's Personal Log (continued) Star Date 65863.3


...I had to return to SB39 for some supplies, the transfer went without incident thanks to M'Kieitt...

...returned to safe zone at best speed...

...K is doing well considering the stress of the situation...

...no word from Orion yet, we definitely need his help on this...

-end log-

Captain's Personal Log (continued) Star Date: 65861.1

...things are quiet here, too quiet. The Remens have been generous enough to shelter us...

...ship and crew are performing well...

-end log-

Captain's Personal Log Star Date: 65874.4

...I and the crew of the "Chessie" were taken prisoner by Emerald Gamma and her little miscreant Alanna. We were held for ransom to get the Armageddon Key, which I found out from Captain Sharpe is NOT a myth...

...apparently Gamma's sidekick is half Vulcan, she forced a mind meld on me (which was very painful), looks like all of that training on Vulcan finally paid off Charon, thank you...

...a rescue effort was mounted to get Kirune off the outpost and back to safety, it was highly successful...

...from appearances I think its safe to say that K has given birth, I wish I had been there for her as planned...damn those Klingons...

...SB39 came under attack and for the first time I saw the "Key" at work for the first time, the effect was far less than I expected...

-end log-

Captain's Personal Log Star Date: 65879.9

<stretches making a content sigh>

...Mmmmm, something special happened last night, Kirune and I "bonded" last night. It was...WONDERFUL! For the first time in a long time I slept well...with K.

<the sound of Z brushing her hair and someone making a sighing sound behind her>

...the Admiral returned to the fleet after his leave, with everything that we briefed him on I think we broke his brain...

-end log-

Captain's Personal Log Star Date: 65882.6

...sitting in the brig waiting for Kirune to come get me. I finally punched Monroe in the face for all his "space lesbian, etc..." comments, the guy had it coming...still doesn't make what I did right. However, I will not tolerate anyone threatening my bond-mates life...no one, hes lucky he decided to beam out rather than take me on. So now I find out that it was some stupid "bio-suit" thing he was wearing that kicked his aggression up...nice. M tried to talk to me about what was going on in my head, but how can I explain it it her, shes never been where I've gone (...and I hope she never does). She doing her best to be my friend and I'm not making it easy for her, but...its so hard to explain. Anyway, shes putting K and me on mandatory leave...maybe Risa would be good or I could show K Andoria, that might be nice...

-end log-

Captain's Personal Log Star Date: 65890.8

...I've been released from the brig into Kirune's custody and placed on medical leave by M'Kieitt to "recover" from my injuries...Risa is looking nice this time of year I hear...

...I have found out that M'Rell was telling me the truth about the conspiracy between SFI and S31 to get the Armageddon Key, and it was mae clear by M that Charon was working for S31 the whole time Gamma and I were with him in the triangle. I find myself regretting following orders now...we might have remained friends if I hadn't...

...Currently I am on the Larimore, the Potomac is paralleling her course to stay near by, the crew was glad that their Captain is "out of the poke" to quote one of the engineering staff...

...Star Fleet Command has suspended all intelligence operations currently in the Sierra sector and terminated my status as an operative...to say I am not relieved would be lying...

...well, K and I finally get to spend some real quality time together at last, so there is a bright side to all of this...

-end log-

Commander's Log Star Date: 65910.7


...no, thats not a mistake...I've been reduced to Commander for my actions against "a fellow Star Fleet Officer", Monroe to be exact...hes not actually in Star Fleet and definitely not an "Officer" by any stretch of the imagination. I was so enraged that he gets to apparently walk away like a rose after his constant "bullying", "insults", and open "threats" to both K'run and I, and then M'Kieitt gets promoted to Admiral (by getting me out of the way...of all the beings I know I never thought she would stoop so low) that I resigned my commission. However, Kirune talked some sense into me and I was allowed to withdraw my resignation...and reasoned with Admiral M'Kieitt to give me back the Potomac. I'm still not happy about the situation as it stands and I fear that the friendship between M'Kieitt and I no longer exists...such a shame really. Regardless; shes my superior officer now and I don't think it can be repaired or recovered, to my eternal regret...but whats done is done...

-end log-

<erroneously makes this a open log>

Commander's Personal Log Star Date: 65915.4

...I don't know what to say, I woke in sickbay with no clear recollection of well...anything since the Chesapeake was captured...I remember bonding with Kirune though, at least one pleasant memory to sustain me. Its like looking through a cloudy mirror, just vague images without details. The Chief Medical Officer says that I have been suffering from a chemical imbalance in my cerebral cortex...I just wish I could remember. I've been demoted for something, it must have been pretty bad...whatever it was, its so hazy right now...maybe I'll have the chance to review my logs later and figure it out. No word from M yet...its odd, I thought she'd be here or at least have inquired about me. They aren't telling me much here about what is going on...is it by orders? Where is K? I'm so confused right now. Oh gods of my ancestors...what have I done?

(supplemental)

...I am...*clears her throat*...stunned, its like a different person was making those logs. Oh GODS what have I done?!?!?! I attacked Monroe...turned on M...the fleet...everything, its over...all gone now...everything I worked for stripped away. My career...my friends...OH GODS...Kirune! What have I done to her...did I do anything...<sound of something smashing on the wall>...I CAN'T REMEMBER! <She begins to sob>...its all gone...all gone...theres nothing left now...everything is ruined...you were right Father...you were right...maybe this was a mistake...oh gods, what do I do...its gone all gone...<descends into quiet sobbing>...

-end log-

Commanders Personal Log Star Date: 65918.3

<Z stands in front of the mirror in her quarters tending to her split lip and bruised face, wincing with each touch>

...I have realized that I did a great deal of damage, even though I don't remember it...ouch, damn Monroe hits hard! It came out that I am half Aenar to Admiral M'Kieitt and Monroe when I had an unexpected vision of where Baker was, I apparantly "touched" one of his experiments or something of the sort...it worries me greatly...

...it would appear that the "mind rape" as Monroe put it, has triggered something that was dormant in my Aenar genetic heritage, I've never had an intuition so strong before...and certainly never a vision like that, it frightens me. However, later I had a "feeling" when we were discussing Admiral Orion...hes hiding something. I don't know what it is, but I fear that he may be in some danger...

...well...ouch, Monroe and I have come to a understanding of a sort I guess. He says he hates me, but has apparently forgiven me for whatever harm I did to him...I can respect that. Admiral M'Kieitt (who has been promoted to Admiral, she deserves no less recognition) is another story however...I fear the damage done to our former friendship is irreparable...to my eternal regret and shame. She was my best friend and I harmed her perhaps more than any other in my madness, I will miss her companionship most of all. My final words to the Admiral was to say goodbye to my friend...*lets out a sigh and sniffles*...end log dammit.

-end log-

Commander's Personal Loge Star Date: 65925.0

Where to begin...so many things have been happening. Star Fleet has sent a vessel to the fleet, their intent is that we have more ships that are better suited to the exploration. To this effect they have assigned an Advanced Excelsior Class Battle Cruiser; prophetically named USS ANDOR II, to augment our fleet compliment. Admiral M'Kieitt has given me command of this powerful vessel, she feels that I am the best suited to be in command...perhaps there is hope yet to salvage something from the damage I have caused; however, I am not raising my hopes in that regard.

There is a new member in the fleet; an ambassador from Bajor...

-end log-

Commander's Log Star Date: 65929.2

...Borg activity near the Bajor system has increased (2 incursions in a single day), this concerns me. There is no reason for them to show this level of interest in Bajor...it does not fit the profile of their usual targets, they have not actually move toward the Bajor system itself...its as if they are looking for something...

...the ANDOR II has proven to be a formidable warship, the crew is adapting well to the change, however we do miss the Potomac...

...personal note, with each passing day I find myself more and more withdrawn from the rest of the personnel in the fleet...*sighs*...it seems like I no longer fit in...

...I miss M...

-end log-

Commander's Personal Log Star Date: 65931.8

...I made my report to Admiral M'Kieitt concerning the Borg presence in the Bajoran Sector of Beta Ursae. She was receptive of my conclusions and even my guesses...

...I recommended that the arrest order for Jordan Baker be rescinded due to the fact that we need his expertise in discovering what is behind the unusual activity that I reported. She was resistant to my suggestion, but was open to reason and I believe she is considering my thoughts seriously...

...I told the Admiral about the man that was Captain Jackson of the Paramore, and of his qualities that gained the respect and love of his crew..."O CAPTAIN! my Captain! our fearful trip is done;
The ship has weather'd every rack, the prize we sought is won;
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring." - Walt Whitman


...the Admiral said something odd, after speaking my mind in a insubordinate yet still respectful manner I remanded myself to what ever disciplinary action she deemed appropriate. However, instead of bring action against me she said..."If I punish you then you might not be willing to speak your mind, which is what I need you to do", followed by "...we both know you are a Captain, even if you aren't wearing the pips on your collar"...

...I attempted to express my loyalty and respect to the Admiral by quoting from Shakespeare's Henry the V, "We few, we happy few, we band of brothers.
For he today that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother..." I believe the meaning was taken...


-end log-

Commander's Personal Log Star Date: 65934.5

...I met with Admiral M'Kieitt and informed her that the refit/upgrade of the USS ANDOR II was complete. Tactical, Engineering, and Science consoles were updated...as were Phasers Arays from the models that came with the ship on arrival. The Photon Torpedoes were upgraded to Quantum Torpedo launchers as well. The Jem'Hadar Shields and Impulse Drive were retro fitted from Potomac easily and incorporated well with the Trans-Warp technology. Commendations to Mr. B'Alok and his staff for the efficiency and speed with which the refit was completed...

...the Admiral's tour went well, she was pleased with the 98.9% efficiency that Mr. B'Alok has attained with the intermix ratio...

...the...Admiral and I have reconciled our friendship. It was both very emotional and...fulfilling, it seems that our friendship is a stronger bond than I had thought it was, a great burden has been lifted from my shoulders...

-end log-

Commander's Personal Log Star Date: 65937.5

...the Admiral, has developed a sense of humor. Using a personal holo-emitter, she disguised herself as a Ferosan mercenary and abducting me from ESB, in the process she damaged my comm-badge setting off a alert on the ADNOR when my bio-signs went offline...

...I took a tour of the Admirals escort carried, I am impressed, it is a beautifully designed ship..

-end log-

Commander's Log Star Date: 65940.6

...we put the Admirals escort carrier to the test last night in simulated war-games. Fist against the ANDOR II, the against Captain Sharpe's ship and the Potomac under my command. The results were interesting and a testament to the Admiral's capabilities, though she was sure to remark that our skills as captains were not to be underestimated by any stretch of the imagination...

...still no word from Kirune, I hope all is well. I miss her terribly...

-End log-

Commander's Log Star Date: 65945.7

...we found an interesting plant on Epsilon Cyrius 338 that "sings", a sample was brought back to the ANDOR for analysis and has been dubbed the "Cyrius Siren" by our resident Botanist...

...I have proposed a plan to attempt to contact this new breed of Borg that we have encountered to the Admiral, I will do all I can to minimize the danger of the plan. It is still risky and may fail...

-end log-

Commander's Log Star Date: 65948.3

...mission successful, after surveying several battlefields we were able to recover an intact specimen. There were unexpected results, on awakening "she" named herself as EVE0001 or just EVE. The Admiral has insisted that she be debriefed by Star Fleet on Earth, against my better judgment I have followed her orders and remanded EVE to SF custody. The Admiral does not seem to share in my view of our mission as Star Fleet Officers and feels that guilt is driving my actions, she could not be more wrong...though I feel partly responsible for EVE's situation there was no way to have known that her kind even existed at all. However, the responsibility for what happens is still ours ( the Federation's) to bear in consequence none the less...

...I received a report that EVE has been very co-operative with Star Fleet, so much so that they have authorized reconstructive surgery to return her to as much of a "normal" state as possible considering her unique physiology. After several hours in treatment she was allowed to speak with me, I must say that the marvels of modern medical technology continue to amaze me. Star Fleet has approved that she be attached to my crew in an "advisory" role in my mission against the Borg, a role she is highly motivated to fill. One observation on my part is that a lot of her memories before being assimilated are gone forever and much like Captain Data she is slowly relearning how to interact socially with other beings. One instance that stands out in my mind was when I found her standing outside of Club 47 staring at the people dancing inside all but clueless to the nature and meaning of the activity she was observing...in so many ways she is almost "child-like" in her naivety about socialization and personal interaction...

-end log-

Commander's Log Star Date: 65956.4


...things are going well on Earth with EVE. I pulled a few strings (what few I still have) and she managed to successfully "test out" for Academy Training. The big brains at Star Fleet think she may have (before she was assimilated) been a Star Fleet Officer and that the neo-nanites that swarm through her body assimilated those dormant memories as needed to survive or something like that(I'm no techie). They have allowed her to move about freely (with myself and Mara as escorts) and she; in some ways, is like a child seeing the world for the first time. Though it is not outwardly obvious in her expressions and body language...as an example that stands out in my mind we took her to Angel Island to soak up some atmosphere (without over whelming her with crowds), she stood silent for a solid hour just watching everything going on around her. My first officer swears that she saw the hint of a smile on EVE, but I can not confirm this. EVE found a great fascination in studying the bark of a tree, she spent no small amount of time taking in its texture and whatever else caught her attention. Originally I had planned to take her into San Francisco again, but decided to allow her to spend the time in the quiet of the our surroundings...I believe it was a wise decision. Maybe it stirred some faint memories or fragments of who she used to be. I am not sure...

Personal Note: She managed to "test out" in 12 hours (without a rest)...even attempting (and losing) the Kobiashi-Maru Exam (My First Officer and I filled in as her Tactical and Science Officers for the simulation with SFA's blessing). EVE seems to have an affinity for Engineering, again this might be a hold over from her past.

-end log-

Commander's Log Star Date: 65970.1

We have returned to SB39 with EvE0001 after the Federation Council determined that she IS a sentient individual that poses no threat to the Federation or Star Fleet and has been assigned to the EF Fleet as a engineering adviser. The Admiral has attached her to my roster and left her assignments to my discretion. At this time I feel that station side duties will be best for her to undertake...

-end log-